30 Jul 2013
17 Jul 2013
16 Jul 2013
Two hundred dustbins
It is the hottest day of the year
There are 200 dustbins to walk past
Every morning
On the way to sit down and work so I can
get paid
And one day live somewhere there is less
garbage
Crushed mint
Vaseline
Music of the gods
And a 14th moon is found
Out there where the lack of air is a gift
Where the closer to the sun you get
The further away from breathing you are
And you need one more line for balance
Space
Time
Absolute quiet
But that line never comes
So you grind teeth and swallow bourbon
And sit in the sun and bake
Trying to see past the burning light
Without actually
Ascending
I turn up the volume
Push up my sunglasses
Look up to try and find moon 14.
12 Jul 2013
Bye bye CBI
A quick post to mourn the passing of a great blog - the Chrome Ball Incident has been logging a serious amount of real skateboard history for a long time now. It was bound to end, as all good thinigs do, but the site - not to mention the integrity with which the posts were written and handled overall - remains truly indispensable.Good work.
4 Jul 2013
Lost cat
A sign on the tree outside
the house
- Lost cat -
Cute photo
Etc
I think we saw it
yesterday
I think, maybe
So I call to say ‘don’t
get your hopes up – but I think…’
Etc
Been there, done
that
So I call, let her
know what I saw and hang up
When I look at the
photo a second time
I see the picture
is of my face
I little greyer
A little fluffier
But it's me no doubt
about it
I check my pockets
Count ten fingers
and ten toes
And am pretty
certain that I am not lost
So I walk down the
path and in the front door
A moment later
there’s a knock
I turn and open it
and am greeted by a large woman
Holding a small
porcelain horse
you called she says
In a vague eastern European
accent
can
you give me more info she says
I couldn’t but
tried anyway
Been there
Done that
She thanked me and
left
I closed the door
and went to the bathroom
Washed my face and
checked the mirror for signs of cat
Nothing
And nothing much else
Really
I look down
Ten toes
I’m not lost
I’m right here
Right?
2 Jul 2013
1 Jul 2013
21 Jun 2013
what the whatwhat
sometimes things have nothing to do with anything.
I mean honestly what the hell is going on here...
7 Jun 2013
Conflicting advice
Gentle voices have
of late
Been telling me to
kill
Or perhaps that’s
too distinct
They have whispered
the blues to me
Warm breath on my
neck
Reassuring me that
there would be no consequences
Fire in my throat
A clear mind
There is little
more terrifying than a clear mind
Not much left to
fear after pure love and security
The true sign of
life for some
Is the true sign of
the end for others
When joy is weighed
down by the shadow
When you only ever laugh while in company
But then
The screams
Bourbon soaked and
Arms scarred
Shouting for you to
rise
To fight for everything
For everyone
Ice down your back
The biggest joke of
all
Looking to the end
of the world and seeing the edge
That really does
exist
And you are
surrounded
Hands taking and
souls giving
Souls or something
But you are far
from alone
And whom do you
reach out to
When all these
words all make so much sense
Though the voices are
all at once black and white
They’re the first truth
and the last lie you’ll ever hear
This is the reason
you sing songs
The reason you
drink and write and
Bang the drum.
30 May 2013
Reverse creep while the goddamn television keeps me down again
Genius idea 1;
I figure
If I log three things at a time
Maybe one of those will save time
Grab someone
You
Them
Condense correlate
Aggregate
Life is like this
A rambling haiku of misspelling
Non-linear
Constant asides
Accidents forgiven
Mistakes forgotten
Love remembered
Someone else’s guitar
While your voice sings along
Albeit silently
A secret well known to all
This late in the game
Nothing linear
If anything
Experience and actions become reversed
Perfect and symmetrically opposite
A crippled symmetry
Here I am alone
Red all around
Flowers and
Wine and heavy curtains that she bought
and got made and
Hung
Here I am alone
Pretending I am young though not wanting
to
Be
And any focus or point or anything of something
that once there was
Long since left me - for sunnier climbs
no doubt
Genius idea 2;
Sit and force it to come
Back
The words are here
there somewhere
Light up
Pour
Swallow
Close my eyes and lie about the page
having an end
About there being rules and facts and a
real world
Just outside somewhere
Even with this sky as light as it is now
at nearly 9pm
I see the reality through the gap in
those dark heavy curtains
How long before we all end up just
coasting along a path
Because that was the easiest thing to do
The safest thing
No one to follow anymore
No one left to lead now
What a predicament
How are the others dealing with this I
wonder…
Do they still have each other
These thoughts are laid down in too
abstract a fashion
Too camouflaged to be considered (I am
aware - I am not stupid)
An intentional wasting of my – and your
– time
So why bother
Because ‘one day’
One day they’ll all wake up
And who knows
Maybe I will too
But until then I now have this
responsibility
Then and now
My opposing forces
Mirrored and so unaware of each other
Countdown is beginning
- has begun
My mistake
The morning birds now sing outside
Into the nighttime clouds
So at least I am not the only one in the
wrong
Here
And I remember that I used to do that
And far from lamenting that time
I am glad to miss it
I shed not a tear for the naivety of our
youngest nights
Full
Stop.
21 May 2013
1939 - 2013
The only thing that ultimately matters is
to eat an ice-cream cone, play a slide trombone, plant a small tree, good God,
now you're free.
16 May 2013
WWIII
'World War 3' is a working title. This is the start of the start of the beginning of a short story I'll probably never finish... peace.
Ours is a small story, told from inside a
far bigger one. The biggest story we’d ever been part of – and the biggest
there would ever be.
The house was merely shell. Orange brick
turned to white chalk. Fragmented and abstract. Blackened, charred. The bright
smouldering long since cooled. Luckily for us the layout of the small 5 room
building was such, that when the last of the big blasts came, the shockwave
passed the south east corner of the house in a kind of slipstream. This left
the large rear bedroom more or less intact – structurally at least.
We had the 3 beds for the 4 of us to share,
a luxury that we’d told the children not to let on to anyone outside the
family. The small stove worked fine and what was left of the bathroom was still
attached to the inside wall of the bedroom so the toilet was workable most of
the time.
Running water hadn’t been anyone’s reality
for I think about 3 months by that time. It was hard to know for sure. We knew
the date from the radio broadcasts, but the events of the period overall, were
all just blurred into one another. The important thing was that the 3 remaining
exterior walls were mostly intact also, forming something that still resembled
a home. Or at least what strangers and scavengers could recognise as having
been a home, once upon a time…
We had managed quite well for the year
since last winter – the one they named ‘the dead winter’. We had seen
neighbours leave in the hope of settling somewhere more populated, seen others
perish. We had watched as those who had retreated to the countryside and outer
suburbs - returned only to fade away weeks later. Meanwhile the decision was
made that we’d stay put – wait it out. What we expected to happen wasn’t
entirely clear, but we felt staying in one place would be safer for the kids.
We were wrong.
9 May 2013
Quote of the day
"Skateboarding is not a hobby. And it is not a sport. Skateboarding is a way of learning how to redefine the world around you. For most people, when they saw a swimming pool, they thought, ‘Let's take a swim.' But I thought, ‘Let's ride it.' When they saw the curb or a street, they would think about driving on it. I would think about the texture. I slowly developed the ability to look at the world through totally different means."
Ian Mackaye
8 May 2013
Quote of the day
I constantly try to reinvent my sensibilities and my ideas. I enjoy some of the satisfaction that I get when I feel good about what I've done. But the process is quite lonely and quite painful. Vincent Gallo
24 Apr 2013
Quote of the day
In the depth of winter I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer. Camus.
22 Apr 2013
Day to day
A while back I was trying to explain to someone how skateboarders see the world on a day-to-day basis. Literally the differences in what we focus on walking down the street or looking out the train window... They didn't really get it and I guess that's not their fault. Unless you've been doing something pretty much constantly for 15-20 years there's no way of identifying that this random outlook just becomes - not even second nature - more like 'first nature'. It's just who you are.
19 Apr 2013
Quote of the day
And there is a time where you can be beyond yourself. You can be better than your technique. You can be better than most of your usual ideas. And this is a whole other category that you can get into. Dave Brubeck
17 Apr 2013
16 Apr 2013
Hardly news
Yet another sideways mood
overtaken at sunrise by it
contemplating
the core of it over
a bowl of
granola
Awoken with it lying in bed next to me
On my pillow with me
Looking into my waking eyes
The simplest desire of all humankind
The one universal truth other than death
The single most shared emotion and
resentment
On Earth
Is the one of having to get up every
morning
And go to the job
I don’t care how good the job may be
and I don’t care
about those who love their work
like their work colleagues
their co-workers
Even if my career involved waking up at noon
and
Hanging out with international rock stars
Even if I could stay in bed and interview
world-famous
Actors and actresses
Over the telephone for a few hours a day
and
Thousands of pounds a week -
I would come to r e s e n t it
There is no time for work
WORK -
To assist another in attaining a final
product that
As recently as a few years back
You had no knowledge of whatsoever
So really how much can it all mean
Sick of it all again
Sick of red wine
Red meat
Sick of bleeding hearts and liars
Sick of both the demands of life and the
lack thereof
Work…
There is no reasonable justification for
this
I have far too many other things to figure
out.
15 Apr 2013
21 Mar 2013
A late night
A late night
An alternate reality
Lives hanging in the balance
An old man with an old heart
Regretful and wanting
Dissatisfied and yearning
A stomach like a calm sea
Shark mind constantly swimming
A late night
Pangs of nostalgia for
Lovers no longer prisoner
To the anger I bring out in people
If I am good at anything
I am good at that
It is a natural gift
Like death
Or a flower opening to the sun.
20 Mar 2013
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