Last day at work...

 

A week off then a new job and no more trains. Very odd - but good.

No poets

I was asked if I could round up some poets for a reading

And I said I can’t remember the last time I

Went to a reading or

Spoke to another writer

This was/is by choice

But it suddenly dawned on me

It may cause me to be viewed as some

Sort of misanthrope

Which I am – but for reasons other than

Objecting to the company of other writers

For so long now

There have been no performances

No poets

No sitting alone drinking like some

Burgundy hearted movie star

Jack and Coke and a keyboard in the corner

There is zero drama

Everything is now clean

A new job

A grown up brain trying

Desperately to hold on to

The memories of why I started to do this

There are painkillers and toys in the bath and

Early nights

There is this underlying happiness

Unsettling and comforting all

At once

There is me and us

But not really them

Anymore

Nothing is missing

But something

Something is suddenly needed

A drive under the influence

A razorblade flashing under a streetlight

Escapades

Screaming women

A bottle thrown at your feet that

Makes you dance one more time.

Del Mar