Pills

Walking past the spot on the street where

The old guy died

Laying there after being hit

The car nowhere to be seen

I feel this small thing

Inching down my neck into my chest

I can’t recall which one it is

There are more and more

Nowadays

Old age shit

Summer pills, winter pills

Oils, lotions and

godknowswhat

There used to be mornings

Get up

Brush teeth and get dressed and

Get the fuck out of the house

But as my temples fade to grey

More bottles

Jars

Things and bits are needed

Before key turns lock

It can all feel like needing a shield

Against the big bad outdoors

Oh I forgot the eye drops

Too

The road there now has fresh white

Crossing lines painted down

And a new island in the middle

I guess someone has to die for

something good to be done around

Here

He was laying there under

Somebody’s jacket

Ambulance on route but you could tell

He was already gone

8.30am so he didn’t get to wherever

He was headed

The pill finds its way down

I stop to buy a coffee to help it on the way.

Marginalia

 

Wilful disobedience has not

Paid off well

And yet this uncontrollable urge

To grab the wheel and

Peel off of the smooth tarmac

Across and down into the margins

Endures

Dress it up as you like

Recalcitrance

The maniacal nature

Of the principled man

But the truth comes up

You gag on it

And they see it

Clear as spit on your chin

But now

Still

I grind away at it

As it in turn grinds me down

The uphill walk to normality

To concession and compromise

Every day

Tomorrow

Yesterday

Today

Is a string of pearls

Waiting to be snapped.