29 Sep 2009

A small victory

‘‘I understand the concept of synchronicity – I mean my favourite movies are always brought up in my favourite TV shows. That means I’m doing something right, right?’’

Today I ate more pasta than any human has ever eaten. It was 2 sittings of cheesy goodness and now I’m ‘fit to burst’, as they say. I watch the girl across from me nibble on salad and sip a thin soup. Lightweight.

Last night as I lay awake in bed, eyes open - my body tired, my mind racing - I thought up an entire stand-up comedy routine. It totaled about 5 minutes and it killed them, the whole room, blackened except for small red table lights and the single spot, roared.

For a moment or two I considered jumping out of bed and writing it all down. Unreal as these jokes were that I had just happened upon, they would work in real life, I knew that without any doubt.

But, laziness plus tiredness, plus warmth divided by stupidity stayed my legs and instead, I closed my eyes and concentrated on the imagined success of that fragile moment.

You can’t lose if you don’t try, I thought as I curled up to her warm back and ass. And burying my face in her neck of long brown hair I felt a little like a failure – but I was a warm, comfortable failure.